We’ve all been annoyed at some point trying to call a customer service number and struggling with the impossible act of getting a human on the phone, right? Sometimes I hit the zero a hundred times and just pray for a human. But they often trick you and say to press 6 to speak to someone. And of course there’s the entering in your entire credit card number only to finally get someone to get on the line and ask you for it again. Why the hell did I just enter it?? I would love to meet someone that designs these elaborate systems to see if they will just admit that the key is to suck you into a vortex of pointlessness. Today I called United Airlines. When saying my name, they understood my first and last name (shocking) but for some reason we got stuck on my middle initial, the dreaded “T”. ‘Did you say “d” as in dog?’ – No. T. – ‘Did you say “b” as in boy?’. No. T as in Tango, dammit. (BTW, I know I’m wasting some of my best sarcasm on a damn robot, but really, how can you not be annoyed at this point??). Then I get what I wanted when I first called 10 minutes ago – ‘let me transfer you to a customer service representative’. Thank you. That was kind of the the point. So then “Ben” who is probably somewhere in India gets on the line and says ‘It looks like you need to know your middle initial.’
Yeah, that’s exactly why I called United Airlines. Because I forgot my freaking middle initial. Thanks, Ben.
